A Disturbing Thought
Lately my hits have been slowly rising, it's hardly a mad rush of surfers beating at my door, but a slow trickle of incoming visitors from google and blogdex and such.
I was checking out the stats today and the search for Xiao Xiao cartoons still seems to be the no. 1 search that brings people here. There was one Google referral that really cracked me up, though: Some guy out there (or gal, who knows) searching for "Tonya Harding Porn" was directed this way due to the fact that I had a story on here about Ms. Harding and Amy Fisher's now defunct boxing match on Fox. (Fisher backed out and is going to be replaced with new contender Paula Jones, by the way)
I just can't help but think that with a zillion terrabytes of porn out there on the internet, it's kind of sad that anyone would waste their time looking for naked pictures of Tonya Harding.
Obviously, this person is completely deranged...but hey - whatever brings 'em in is fine by me. That said, I'd like to take a yet another google-baiting moment to mention "XXX sex porn shoe fetish asian bondage Bea Arthur naked."
Sunday, March 03, 2002
Saturday, March 02, 2002
Seriously, though, she couldn't have come up with anything more imaginative?
Gee, you know, I would have thought that moms gave up on smuggling things into prisons for their sons by placing the objects in a bible, isn't that sort of a cliche` at this point? You can bet that anytime you bring an inmate a bible, the first thing that pops into the jailer's head is "hacksaw" or "dope".
Yahoo! News - Mother Said to Smuggle Saw Blades to Jailed Son
Gee, you know, I would have thought that moms gave up on smuggling things into prisons for their sons by placing the objects in a bible, isn't that sort of a cliche` at this point? You can bet that anytime you bring an inmate a bible, the first thing that pops into the jailer's head is "hacksaw" or "dope".
Yahoo! News - Mother Said to Smuggle Saw Blades to Jailed Son
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Today's skin is called "CU Amp", short for cunieform...real nice detail and a good amp to "rock out" with. Yes, I realize how lame that was, it's late and I'm tired, anyways, enjoy the skin, here it is - CU Amp.
Today's skin is called "CU Amp", short for cunieform...real nice detail and a good amp to "rock out" with. Yes, I realize how lame that was, it's late and I'm tired, anyways, enjoy the skin, here it is - CU Amp.
How Do I Make Him Jump?
Say you want to play an old SNES game (or any videogame, for that matter - PC, Gameboy, Playstation 2, etc.) but you've lost the book and have no idea how anything works or what to do? This obsessive megasite appears to have a FAQ for any game you can imagine. Definitely handy to have around for emulation fans, seeing as rom images rarely come with instruction booklets.
GameFAQs
Say you want to play an old SNES game (or any videogame, for that matter - PC, Gameboy, Playstation 2, etc.) but you've lost the book and have no idea how anything works or what to do? This obsessive megasite appears to have a FAQ for any game you can imagine. Definitely handy to have around for emulation fans, seeing as rom images rarely come with instruction booklets.
GameFAQs
Sidescrolling 2-D Goodness
I was looking at this site and thinking to myself how much I missed the days before three-dimensional videogame perspective became the norm...there was a lot to be said for two-dimensional platform games of the "Mario" variety and the side-scrolling shooter is another genre you don't see much anymore. This site celebrates games in the latter category and their "boss" characters, with links to roms and emulators for these old-school console classics - games like R-Type and Darius Twin.
DESTROY ALL MONSTERS! Classic Video Game Bosses..
I was looking at this site and thinking to myself how much I missed the days before three-dimensional videogame perspective became the norm...there was a lot to be said for two-dimensional platform games of the "Mario" variety and the side-scrolling shooter is another genre you don't see much anymore. This site celebrates games in the latter category and their "boss" characters, with links to roms and emulators for these old-school console classics - games like R-Type and Darius Twin.
DESTROY ALL MONSTERS! Classic Video Game Bosses..
3D Gladiators
A really hardcore fan site featuring nicely done 3-D renderings of the Star Trek universe.
3D Gladiators Premier
A really hardcore fan site featuring nicely done 3-D renderings of the Star Trek universe.
3D Gladiators Premier
Chatner!
Chatner! is a funny little chat program done in flash - choose a favorite Trek character, dress them up as you like and yack with other characters as you walk around the bridge.
Load Chatner!
Friday, March 01, 2002
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Today's skin is called Edo Shikaku...I have no idea what that means but it's a really pretty martial-arts slanted skin. That said, here ya go, today's skin of the day, Edo Shikaku.
Today's skin is called Edo Shikaku...I have no idea what that means but it's a really pretty martial-arts slanted skin. That said, here ya go, today's skin of the day, Edo Shikaku.
I Didn't Know Melanie Griffith and Bo Derek Were Both Mauled By Lions...
A loop is a "collection of famous people who share something in common. That 'something' may be a job, a hobby, a mode of death."
Who2 Loop: More Loops
A loop is a "collection of famous people who share something in common. That 'something' may be a job, a hobby, a mode of death."
Who2 Loop: More Loops
Thursday, February 28, 2002
Latest Sign of the Decline of Western Civilization:
Wild woman skater Tonya Harding and "Long Island Lolita", Amy Fisher are going to box on Fox...seriously.
NYPOST.COM National News: TONYA & AMY ARE READY TO RUMBLE ON TV By MICHAEL STARR
Wild woman skater Tonya Harding and "Long Island Lolita", Amy Fisher are going to box on Fox...seriously.
NYPOST.COM National News: TONYA & AMY ARE READY TO RUMBLE ON TV By MICHAEL STARR
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Ground control to Major Tom...Ground Control to Major Tom...
Today's skin is a really nicely done design that pays tribute to the original Space Oddity, with tight graphics, easy to navigate controls and style to spare...the Major Tom Remix.
Ground control to Major Tom...Ground Control to Major Tom...
Today's skin is a really nicely done design that pays tribute to the original Space Oddity, with tight graphics, easy to navigate controls and style to spare...the Major Tom Remix.
Wednesday, February 27, 2002
Virtual Horse Racing
Sign up and train, feed and take care of your own thoroughbred, then compete against others for real prize money.
Unreal Racing
Sign up and train, feed and take care of your own thoroughbred, then compete against others for real prize money.
Unreal Racing
Rack 'em!
In case anyone has noticed, I haven't been posting as frequently or rambling as much these last few days. In part, this can be blamed on Yahoo!'s Pool game.
It's a multiplayer eight-ball game sort of like Side Pocket on the old SNES system, but not quite as good.
The gameplay is frustrating sometimes, the programmers' interpetation of the rules of eight ball is dubious and a lot of the players are rude a**holes who tend to leave mid-game or call you a "(expletive) loser" when they win.
Regardless, I'm hooked and I've been playing it a lot lately. If you happen to be there and browsing the game rooms, I'm supermanspaljimmyolsen - aka "Kid Scratch". Bring your own chalk.
Yahoo! Games - Pool
This Is the End, Beautiful Friend - the End...
A blow-by-blow account of the many and varied apocalyptic predictions by prophets and doomsayers throughout history.
A Brief History of the Apocalypse
A blow-by-blow account of the many and varied apocalyptic predictions by prophets and doomsayers throughout history.
A Brief History of the Apocalypse
Tuesday, February 26, 2002
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Well, the first skin of the day I posted was one based on the illustrious yellow dot-chomper, Pac-Man. Today's skin features Pac's better half, the lovely Ms. Pac-Man.
Well, the first skin of the day I posted was one based on the illustrious yellow dot-chomper, Pac-Man. Today's skin features Pac's better half, the lovely Ms. Pac-Man.
Monday, February 25, 2002
What Kind of Library Are They Running, Anyway???
Man sues Columbus Metropolitan library because their not allowing him to go in barefoot is violating his right to self-expression.
Library counters that it's to "protect patron safety" and cites the fact that they've found "broken glass, blood, feces and semen on its floors."
I don't know what libraries are like in Columbus but if I'm ever in Ohio and need something to read I think I'll just go to a bookstore, after reading this.
newsnet5.com - News - Man Sues Library For Not Letting Him Go Barefoot
Man sues Columbus Metropolitan library because their not allowing him to go in barefoot is violating his right to self-expression.
Library counters that it's to "protect patron safety" and cites the fact that they've found "broken glass, blood, feces and semen on its floors."
I don't know what libraries are like in Columbus but if I'm ever in Ohio and need something to read I think I'll just go to a bookstore, after reading this.
newsnet5.com - News - Man Sues Library For Not Letting Him Go Barefoot
Online Gadgetry: SeeStorm Messenger
Say you like the idea of video conferencing, but you're too shy to let everyone stare at your face?
Well, the folks at SeeStorm may have just what you need. Their new instant messenger uses 3d avatars in lieu of a cam feed - you provide the voice, they provide the face(s).
SeeStorm works pretty much like any other messenger, with a buddy list and an online directory, as well as a simple text chat. The main difference is the avatars, which mouth along with you as you talk to your online chat partners.
Avatars include George Bush, Vladmir Putin, Santa Claus and (if you're willing to shell out the fourteen bucks) a custom 3d avatar of your own face, made from photos you send in to the company.
SeeStorm Inc Home
Kiss Your Favorite Streaming Radio Stations Goodbye
Streaming internet radio stations were dealt a tough blow yesterday, as a Federal panel put forth a new set of Web music royalty rates that will cost stations .14 cents per song and are retroactive to 1998.
The stations - already struggling to find ways of bringing in revenue -will be hit hard by the new plan, which set the royalty rate at about ten times the rate webcasters suggested.
The new rates will wind up costing Live365.com - a popular station with about 2 million unique visits a month - an extra $150,000 dollars monthly, whereas smaller stations will probably be driven off the net altogether.
Panel sets royalty rate for music on Web radio
Streaming internet radio stations were dealt a tough blow yesterday, as a Federal panel put forth a new set of Web music royalty rates that will cost stations .14 cents per song and are retroactive to 1998.
The stations - already struggling to find ways of bringing in revenue -will be hit hard by the new plan, which set the royalty rate at about ten times the rate webcasters suggested.
The new rates will wind up costing Live365.com - a popular station with about 2 million unique visits a month - an extra $150,000 dollars monthly, whereas smaller stations will probably be driven off the net altogether.
Panel sets royalty rate for music on Web radio
Pat the Obessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Today's skin is just a really pretty design with a lot of attention to detail. If it has a theme I guess it would be "alchemy". At any rate...here it is, today's skin - Chemical Gold.
Sunday, February 24, 2002
Benefitting From Xiao Xiao's Success
It appears that I've gotten a number of visits from people searching Google for the Xiao Xiao stick figure kung-fu shorts, which I posted links to on a couple of occasions.
No real point to this story, just thought I'd mention Xiao Xiao again since it seems to be boosting my popularity somewhat.
Oh, also I'd like to take this moment say "FREE XXX KINKY PORN and FREE MP3s"in hopes it has the same effect.
It appears that I've gotten a number of visits from people searching Google for the Xiao Xiao stick figure kung-fu shorts, which I posted links to on a couple of occasions.
No real point to this story, just thought I'd mention Xiao Xiao again since it seems to be boosting my popularity somewhat.
Oh, also I'd like to take this moment say "FREE XXX KINKY PORN and FREE MP3s"in hopes it has the same effect.
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Here's the Winamp Skin of the day, a little number called "Handwritten".
Here's the Winamp Skin of the day, a little number called "Handwritten".
Mapping the Red Giant
Using images made in 1999 by the Mars Global Surveyor, scientists have produced the most detailed map yet of the planet's surface, all of which can be viewed here.
Space News
"Admiral, there be whales here!" - Life imitates Trek
Star Trek fans may recall a scene from the big-screener "The Voyage Home" in which Scotty provides a flabbergasted twentieth-century engineer with a formula for "transparent aluminum" - in exchange for the material and facilities he needed to build a huge, humpbacked whale-housing aquarium (long story).
Anyway, it appears that the folks at the Fraunhofer Institute for Ceramic Technologies have succeeded in slapping together some of the fictional high-strength material on their own - without the benefit of everyone's favorite Enterprise engineer.
Slashdot | Transparent Aluminium
"Meeting girls is easy this way," said Amir, as he continued typing, "You can be relaxed no worries."
This really surprised me - I would have assumed that Iranian isps were submitted to strict guidelines and filtering of their web access.
That doesn't seem to be the case - in fact many isps there, according to this story in The Guardian - use their uncensored status as a selling point.
I don't know what to after reading this story - should I take it as a sign of hope, an indication that the flood of outside information could someday open the country up to an appreciation of outside opinion and ideas - or should I be mad because this burgeoning wave of Iranian net consumers are likely to have faster internet connections the one I have here in rural Alabama?
Oh cable companies...why hath thou forsaken me?
Guardian Unlimited | The Guardian | Iran nets another revolt
This really surprised me - I would have assumed that Iranian isps were submitted to strict guidelines and filtering of their web access.
That doesn't seem to be the case - in fact many isps there, according to this story in The Guardian - use their uncensored status as a selling point.
I don't know what to after reading this story - should I take it as a sign of hope, an indication that the flood of outside information could someday open the country up to an appreciation of outside opinion and ideas - or should I be mad because this burgeoning wave of Iranian net consumers are likely to have faster internet connections the one I have here in rural Alabama?
Oh cable companies...why hath thou forsaken me?
Guardian Unlimited | The Guardian | Iran nets another revolt
Mmmm...carcinogens (drool)
If I had an Amazon wishlist, this would be on it:
Amazon.com: Weber 758098 22 1/2-Inch One-Touch Gold Charcoal Kettle--The Simpsons 10th Anniversary Limited Edition Grill
If I had an Amazon wishlist, this would be on it:
Amazon.com: Weber 758098 22 1/2-Inch One-Touch Gold Charcoal Kettle--The Simpsons 10th Anniversary Limited Edition Grill
Saturday, February 23, 2002
Kaleidoscope Painter
A neat java applet that lets you paint kaleidoscopic patterns.
Kaleidoscope Painter
Chuck Jones Dead at 89
This really took me by surprise. Just the other day I posted some stuff regarding Chuck on the blog. You can see the post - which includes links to the current project he was working on for WB's site - Thomas Timberwolf - as well as his homepage, by clicking this link.
Chuck worked on such classic cartoons as Bugs Bunny and the Road Runner, as well as producing, animating and writing the screenplay for The Grinch That Stole Christmas television special.
He also created such memorable characters as Marvin the Martian. He was truly one of the great animators of all time and by all accounts, a nice guy as well.
He'll be sorely missed by the many fans of his work.
Newsday.com - Animator Chuck Jones Dies at 89
Man Dies After falling on Coffee Mug
It's true what they say, you never know when you're time is gonna come, how unlucky was this poor guy though?
Newsday.com - Man Dies After Falling on Coffee Mug
It's true what they say, you never know when you're time is gonna come, how unlucky was this poor guy though?
Newsday.com - Man Dies After Falling on Coffee Mug
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Today's skin is yet another old-school videogame inspired creation, fashioned after the world of everyone's favorite brick-busting, mushroom meister, Mario...it's the Mario Amp:
Today's skin is yet another old-school videogame inspired creation, fashioned after the world of everyone's favorite brick-busting, mushroom meister, Mario...it's the Mario Amp:
Friday, February 22, 2002
My Crazy Granny
Warning: There's some off-color language on this site and frankly it's just plain mean-spirited but I laughed my ass off at it nonetheless.
index
Warning: There's some off-color language on this site and frankly it's just plain mean-spirited but I laughed my ass off at it nonetheless.
index
Please Step This Way, M'aam...It's a Matter of National Security.
This site was posted on BoingBoing a couple days ago and I just got around to looking at it today. A security guard at the Winter Olympics runs this blog and has some really hilarious takes on the games:
A quick piece of advice if you're pretty hot and trying to enter a secure location: Some (a very few) male security personnel will kick the magnetometer to make it sound an alarm as you pass.
Why?
So they may ask you to step to the side and "wand" you.
My request:
Call them on it. I'd love to see their face. Or at least tell them to send over a female wander. Or both.
b-may
BottleCaps.org
Fear not, lonely bottlecap collectors...you need not live a life of isolation anymore: BottleCaps.org is a haven for you and your obsessive/compulsive kind, with galleries of various national and international caps as well as links to such other fringe hobbies like beer can collecting and beer tray collecting.
BottleCaps.org - The Site For Antique and Collectable Bottle Caps
FILMSON: A site that lets you search for online films by title, cast and crew or reviews.
FILMSON - Your Guide to Online Films
FILMSON - Your Guide to Online Films
Yeah, But What If You're Color-Blind?
Doctor Paul Goldin claims he can generate a profile of your personality based solely on your choice of colors in his "Colorgenics" test...I took it and I suppose a lot of it was right, seemed like a kind of a vague description that anyone could have applied to themselves, however. I'm including it though on account of the Flash quiz's neat ambient music and because I know how many test-taking nuts there are out there.
::: The Amazing World of Colorgenics :::
I Swear, Officer - I Only Use It For My Arthritis Pain
An 81-year-old woman was arrested in Miami for attempting to smuggle 9,931 doses of Ecstasy in her luggage on a flight from London. Surprisingly, this isn't an isolated case, either - last March a 72-year-old tailor from New York was charged with bringing 61,691 ecstasy tablets with him on a flight from Paris to Miami.
This is why I no longer allow my grandmother to attend raves.
myCFnow.com - 81-Year-Old Woman Charged With Smuggling Ecstasy
An 81-year-old woman was arrested in Miami for attempting to smuggle 9,931 doses of Ecstasy in her luggage on a flight from London. Surprisingly, this isn't an isolated case, either - last March a 72-year-old tailor from New York was charged with bringing 61,691 ecstasy tablets with him on a flight from Paris to Miami.
This is why I no longer allow my grandmother to attend raves.
myCFnow.com - 81-Year-Old Woman Charged With Smuggling Ecstasy
Shake, Rattle and Roll
California had an earthquake measuring 5.2 on the Richter scale today.
We had an earthquake here awhile back and it freaked me out. I didn't even know we had earthquakes in Alabama.
My friend James and I were sitting around watching television and there's this rumbling that shakes his house a little and we were like, "What the @#%!% was that?". It was just a small one, I think a 3 point something or other. I thought maybe a truck had overturned outside or someone was dynamiting stumps. I did a little looking around and it turns out we had another small one back in 1996 that I'd never even heard about.
Like we don't already have enough worries due to tornadoes, now I have to sweat earthquakes too.
Recent Earthquakes in California and Nevada - Index Map
California had an earthquake measuring 5.2 on the Richter scale today.
We had an earthquake here awhile back and it freaked me out. I didn't even know we had earthquakes in Alabama.
My friend James and I were sitting around watching television and there's this rumbling that shakes his house a little and we were like, "What the @#%!% was that?". It was just a small one, I think a 3 point something or other. I thought maybe a truck had overturned outside or someone was dynamiting stumps. I did a little looking around and it turns out we had another small one back in 1996 that I'd never even heard about.
Like we don't already have enough worries due to tornadoes, now I have to sweat earthquakes too.
Recent Earthquakes in California and Nevada - Index Map
Insane Cat Painter Follow Up:
Regarding the insane cat-loving artist I just posted...a fellow on the BoingBoing discussion board for the story posted this link with tons of info and pictures of the artist's (Louis Wain's) work, if anyone is interested.
disinformation | louis wain, pussy lover
Regarding the insane cat-loving artist I just posted...a fellow on the BoingBoing discussion board for the story posted this link with tons of info and pictures of the artist's (Louis Wain's) work, if anyone is interested.
disinformation | louis wain, pussy lover
Art by Psychotics.
A gallery of paintings done by schizophrenic (and suspected schizophrenics - like Hienonymus Bosch).
Be sure and look at the freaky psychedelic cat on the top left, when you click that one it shows you a progression of paintings that were done by the artist (whose typical subject matter was humorous depictions of cats) as his mania spiraled further and further out of control.
Another note of interest - I noticed that the second painting from the right - middle row - was utilized as cover art for the Van Halen album "Fair Warning" (my favorite Van Halen album, incidentally. Does this make me psychotic? Keep in mind that this was before Van Halen sucked).
Neuroscience Art Gallery
A gallery of paintings done by schizophrenic (and suspected schizophrenics - like Hienonymus Bosch).
Be sure and look at the freaky psychedelic cat on the top left, when you click that one it shows you a progression of paintings that were done by the artist (whose typical subject matter was humorous depictions of cats) as his mania spiraled further and further out of control.
Another note of interest - I noticed that the second painting from the right - middle row - was utilized as cover art for the Van Halen album "Fair Warning" (my favorite Van Halen album, incidentally. Does this make me psychotic? Keep in mind that this was before Van Halen sucked).
Neuroscience Art Gallery
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
I wasn't around tonight, I was hanging out with my friend Chris and his cousin so I didn't get around to blogging anything and probably I'm not gonna post a lot of stuff on here this morning. I'll try and make up for it tonight but I had to get on long enough to at least post the skin of the day. Here's a good one - I tend to favor the those that have a really different look to them and aren't just knockoffs of the same kind of futuristic/goth/quake-ish things you see all the time. This is a pretty good example of one that stands apart from the crowd -
Denim Amp.
I wasn't around tonight, I was hanging out with my friend Chris and his cousin so I didn't get around to blogging anything and probably I'm not gonna post a lot of stuff on here this morning. I'll try and make up for it tonight but I had to get on long enough to at least post the skin of the day. Here's a good one - I tend to favor the those that have a really different look to them and aren't just knockoffs of the same kind of futuristic/goth/quake-ish things you see all the time. This is a pretty good example of one that stands apart from the crowd -
Denim Amp.
Thursday, February 21, 2002
"i totally have a crush on derek powazek and like haha i wish i got an anti-bloggie."
This is pretty funny...an instant "teen weblog" generator, as well as a "spam generator" scripted by Daniel Bogan.(Warning: off-color language)
waferbaby » hummer
This is pretty funny...an instant "teen weblog" generator, as well as a "spam generator" scripted by Daniel Bogan.(Warning: off-color language)
waferbaby » hummer
This Is What Happens When You Let Rednecks Have Access To Computers
As if videogames didn't cop a bad enough rap already because of their violent themes, racist groups are now taking it a step further - games that are specifically geared towards the goal of making racism and genocide "hip" among young gamers.
Primarily variations of such games as Doom and Quake, they feature gameplay that centers around murdering members of particular minority groups - i.e. blacks, jews and latinos. One game even goes so far as to be set in a concentration camp. It's goal? To kill as many jewish prisoners (or rats, as they're referred to in the game) as possible.
The article here - from Wired, even mentions one of these idiots having bastardized my beloved Pac-Man, which - coincidentally - I've been writing about here for the past hour...sigh...have I ever mentioned what a screwed up world this is?
"I hate Illinois Nazis." Jake Blues - The Blues Brothers
Games Elevate Hate to Next Level
As if videogames didn't cop a bad enough rap already because of their violent themes, racist groups are now taking it a step further - games that are specifically geared towards the goal of making racism and genocide "hip" among young gamers.
Primarily variations of such games as Doom and Quake, they feature gameplay that centers around murdering members of particular minority groups - i.e. blacks, jews and latinos. One game even goes so far as to be set in a concentration camp. It's goal? To kill as many jewish prisoners (or rats, as they're referred to in the game) as possible.
The article here - from Wired, even mentions one of these idiots having bastardized my beloved Pac-Man, which - coincidentally - I've been writing about here for the past hour...sigh...have I ever mentioned what a screwed up world this is?
"I hate Illinois Nazis." Jake Blues - The Blues Brothers
Games Elevate Hate to Next Level
Pac-man Fever!
While I'm on the subject of Pac-Man, here's an interesting tidbit of Pac-history.
I was reading an article at Twin Galaxies' - the official authority on videogame records - describing perhaps the single most awe-inspiring Pac-Man moment of all time, the first perfect score on a game of Pac-Man, achieved by Billy Mitchell - a Fort Lauderdale, Florida hot sauce manufacturer - on July 3, 1999 at 4:45 P.M. at the Funspot Family Fun Center in Weirs Beach, NH.
Now, in order to get a perfect score on Pac-Man, a player has to achieve a score of 3,333,360 points - the maximum possible points allowed by the game. This means eating every last dot, every energizer, killing every blue ghost, getting every fruit and surviving to the 256th level, which ends in a split-screen. All of this must all be accomplished on a single quarter - which is why in the game's 20 years of existence, nobody was able to accomplish the feat - even though by Twin Galaxies's best estimates, the game has been played somewhere in the neighborhood of 10,000,000,000 times since it's introduction.
The Perfect Pac-Man Game became an arcade Mount Everest of sorts and was a hotly contested badge of honor sought by the world's hardest-core joystick-jockeys...these guys were dead serious - listen to this snippet from the Galaxies article:
Mitchell, who refused to eat until he beat the Canadians for the world record, went hungry for nearly two full days. “I had to be first,” Mitchell explains. “Its like Neil Armstrong walking on the moon. No matter how many people accomplish the feat afterwards, it will always be Armstrong who will be remembered for doing it first. And, best of all, it was an American.”
I'm not sure if it was quite as big a deal as the first moonwalk, but for Billy Mitchell, it was the pinnacle of his gaming career - an illustrious one, too - Billy also holds the world record for Donkey Kong.
In the end, with the grueling six-hour game behind him, eyes bloodshot, victory his at last, Billy backed away from the machine and announced:
“I never have to play that darn game again,” he sighed in relief. “There’s nothing more I can accomplish.”
Said like a true American hero. This Bud's for you, Billy.
Click here for an interview with Billy about his perfect game on Videogames.com and if this got you in the mood to chomp a few dots, you can find some Pac-Man Clones here.
Is That a Dot or Some Dust On My Screen? Oops! Game Over.
The folks at Tiny Windows Games have released a few new items - including a Tiny Pac-Man (screenshot below, shown actual size), Tiny Donkey Kong, Tiny Pengo,Tiny Frogger and Tiny Mario Brothers.
Only problem is, as opposed to their other tiny games - (Tiny Space Invaders, Simon, Chess, etc.) - these new games are actually emulators...which means you'll have to download the games' corresponding rom files in order to make them playable.
It may not be worth the hassle to you unless you're really nutty about retro arcade games. I'm only mentioning it here because I love 'em and because of the novelty factor.
Tiny Windows Games
The folks at Tiny Windows Games have released a few new items - including a Tiny Pac-Man (screenshot below, shown actual size), Tiny Donkey Kong, Tiny Pengo,Tiny Frogger and Tiny Mario Brothers.
Only problem is, as opposed to their other tiny games - (Tiny Space Invaders, Simon, Chess, etc.) - these new games are actually emulators...which means you'll have to download the games' corresponding rom files in order to make them playable.
It may not be worth the hassle to you unless you're really nutty about retro arcade games. I'm only mentioning it here because I love 'em and because of the novelty factor.
Tiny Windows Games
Pat the Obsessive Winamp Skin Collector's Skin of the Day:
Today's skin bears a theme that's near and dear to my heart - The Beatles. A simple, clean design with easily-navigated buttons, it's a nice little homage to the Fab Four's movie of the same name, The Yellow Submarine Amp.
Today's skin bears a theme that's near and dear to my heart - The Beatles. A simple, clean design with easily-navigated buttons, it's a nice little homage to the Fab Four's movie of the same name, The Yellow Submarine Amp.
Timmmmberrrr!!!!!
Thomas Timber Wolf is a new online cartoon directed by Chuck Jones, one of the geniuses behind a lot of the best Warner Brothers Looney Tunes...this new series of flash cartoons marks his first new characters for WB since he created Marvin the Martian.
Warner Bros. Online: Timber Wolf
Japanese Game Show / Torturefest Makes Fear Factor Look Like Trip To Spa
When it comes to their gameshows, the Japanese have a real bloodlust that far exceeds our humble fare of contestants eating bugs and performing such mundane tasks as bungee jumping and the like. I'm quite confident that none of the contestants in any television show here, such as Survivor or Fear Factor, could have dealt with the kind of treatment Japanese comic Nabusi dealt with:
Nippon Television's (NTV) producers have obviously never heard of the Geneva Convention. If they had, they wouldn't have treated poor Nasubi the way they did. They wouldn't have stripped him naked and shut him in an apartment, alone with no food, furniture, household goods, or entertainment. They wouldn't have kept him there for over a year until he had won $10 000 in prizes by sending in postcards to contests. They wouldn't have cut him off from the world and they would have told him that he was on nation-wide TV.
It gets much worse...you have to hand it to the Japanese, anyone who can make tackier television than us deserves a medal...however, if this is how a gameshow contestant is treated, I can't imagine what their prison system must be like.
nasubi
Wednesday, February 20, 2002
Okay, I'm back with the popcorn...what, you mean it's already over?
Think of all the time and money you could save if, instead of renting movies, you could just read a quick, ultra-condensed sypnosis? This is the mission of the folks at Movie-A-Minute. Here are a couple examples:
Good Will Hunting
Directed by Gus Van Sant
1997
Matt Damon: I'm smart, but so what? Let's get drunk and pick up chicks.
Robin Williams: If you push people away, they can't be close to you.
Matt Damon: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP you fixed me thank you I love you. (cries)
The End
Pretty Woman
Directed by Garry Marshall
1990
Julia Roberts: I'm a hooker but I don't kiss on the lips.
Richard Gere: I have a lot of money.
(smooch)
The End
Movie-A-Minute
Think of all the time and money you could save if, instead of renting movies, you could just read a quick, ultra-condensed sypnosis? This is the mission of the folks at Movie-A-Minute. Here are a couple examples:
Good Will Hunting
Directed by Gus Van Sant
1997
Matt Damon: I'm smart, but so what? Let's get drunk and pick up chicks.
Robin Williams: If you push people away, they can't be close to you.
Matt Damon: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP you fixed me thank you I love you. (cries)
The End
Pretty Woman
Directed by Garry Marshall
1990
Julia Roberts: I'm a hooker but I don't kiss on the lips.
Richard Gere: I have a lot of money.
(smooch)
The End
Movie-A-Minute
Announcing a Brand New Feature: Pat the Obsessive Skin Collector's Winamp Skin of the Day!
I'm a nut about my Winamp, I have tons of freaky plugins and gadgets for it and I spent a fair amount of time (well, an obsessive amount of time would be more to the point) looking for cool Winamp skins to dress it up with. Some of them are really nice.
Thus, for no particular reason I've decided to post my favorites here on the blog. I was going to do a "top ten" or "top twenty list" originally - however, I've decided instead to post a Winamp "skin of the day", that way I can post a small picture of each skin so you can preview it, without having to slow the site down any more than I have to. Besides, it's more fun that way and it gives me something to fill up space.
By the way, I didn't design any of these skins, they were all found at Winamp.com and other skin-related sites, like Skinz.org. I'd like to include the names of the people who did make them...however, it would be such a hassle to go back and find the exact links I'm just going to post them without credits, my apologies to the author and if by some miracle one of them happens by here and sees his/her skin, please drop me a line so I can credit you and thank you.
Now then, here it is, the first in a series - The Skin of the Day, Pac-Amp:
I'm a nut about my Winamp, I have tons of freaky plugins and gadgets for it and I spent a fair amount of time (well, an obsessive amount of time would be more to the point) looking for cool Winamp skins to dress it up with. Some of them are really nice.
Thus, for no particular reason I've decided to post my favorites here on the blog. I was going to do a "top ten" or "top twenty list" originally - however, I've decided instead to post a Winamp "skin of the day", that way I can post a small picture of each skin so you can preview it, without having to slow the site down any more than I have to. Besides, it's more fun that way and it gives me something to fill up space.
By the way, I didn't design any of these skins, they were all found at Winamp.com and other skin-related sites, like Skinz.org. I'd like to include the names of the people who did make them...however, it would be such a hassle to go back and find the exact links I'm just going to post them without credits, my apologies to the author and if by some miracle one of them happens by here and sees his/her skin, please drop me a line so I can credit you and thank you.
Now then, here it is, the first in a series - The Skin of the Day, Pac-Amp:
While I'm on the subject of Steve Martin, I'd like to toss out a few links to a some of his hilarious essays I've found on the web. He's a really funny author as well as actor and screenwriter and his written humor has the same kind of off-kilter, odd quality to it as his stand-up comedy did. "Dear Amanda" and "A Public Apology" are pieces he wrote for The New Yorker. "Writing Is Easy!" is an excerpt from his book, "Pure Drivel". Funny stuff.
Two of the very funniest flash cartoons I've ever seen - "Morto the Magician" and "Gwyneth and Steve", written by and starring my comedy hero, Steve Martin - the original Wild and Crazy Guy. I really wish they'd come out with another installment, Steve's site mentioned another one called Hapless Bachelor but so far no sign of it.
Counting Down Theater - Steve Martin
From this week's installment of The Onion, posted along with a shoutout - to Jordan, Sarah and Tara:
That Trip To Canada Really Broadened My Horizons
That Trip To Canada Really Broadened My Horizons
Wet Cats In Danger of Extinction!
Here's the angry wet cat pic of the day. Sadly, I'm afraid I may have to end this short-lived tradition soon, as it's getting harder to find any that meet up to my stringent standards. Scouring Google's image search provided a lot of pictures of soaked felines, to be sure. However, in order to meet the requirements necessary for my inclusion here the cat must be not only wet, but angry and at least semi-comical as well.
We'll see. It may come down to just posting a "funny" picture of the day, though, so enjoy these while you can. By the way, don't you admire the adult-like restraint I've shown by not once mentioning the very obvious play on words that the term "wet cat" presents? This is a wholesome family show, kids :)
Here's the angry wet cat pic of the day. Sadly, I'm afraid I may have to end this short-lived tradition soon, as it's getting harder to find any that meet up to my stringent standards. Scouring Google's image search provided a lot of pictures of soaked felines, to be sure. However, in order to meet the requirements necessary for my inclusion here the cat must be not only wet, but angry and at least semi-comical as well.
We'll see. It may come down to just posting a "funny" picture of the day, though, so enjoy these while you can. By the way, don't you admire the adult-like restraint I've shown by not once mentioning the very obvious play on words that the term "wet cat" presents? This is a wholesome family show, kids :)
Yacking with the Babel Fish:
So I'm bored and looking for things to do and I go to Altavista's Babelfish translator, which is supposed to translate web pages and text for you, from German to English or Spanish to Russian or what have you. It's been around awhile and I always thought it was a neat little web application, in theory - sort of like the "universal translators" they used on Star Trek to converse with people of other races.
Only thing is, it doesn't really work that well...you can get some pretty odd interpetations of the language sometimes...for instance, here's a section of a recent news article about James Brown, in it's original English:
James Brown Off the Hook
A Los Angeles Superior Court jury has cleared James Brown of sexual harassment charges against a former female employee, but ruled the soul belter's company must still face the music for wrongfully terminating her.
Lisa Ross Agbalaya, a 36-year-old former model and mother of three who served as the West Coast president of James Brown Enterprises, sued the legendary singer for $1 million, accusing him of harassing her and making unwanted sexual advances when she visited his home in Augusta, Georgia, in 1999.
The suit, filed in May 2000, claimed, " 'Sex Machine' is more than simply a title to one of James Brown's many hit records; it would also appear to be a description of James Brown the man."
(Article from Entertainment - E! Online Music)
Okay...now here's the article after I translated it (using Babelfish) into Japanese, then back to English. (note: I've left a blank underline in the spot where translation of the Japanese characters seemed not to have worked at all, in lieu of pasting them (so no one would have to hassle with a "this page requires Japanese language support" download message from their browser) and inserted caps where needed) :
The James Becomes Brown from the Hook Separated
The Teaching Father of Mind feels approximately now whose substance is good.
The jury of the Los Angeles excellent courthouse removed the Brown of the James of ____ fullness vis-a-vis the employee of the female before, the company of the belter of mind being controlled, music in order to finish her illegally must calm down the surface.
She was useful the Augusta, when Georgia visited that house someone bother her as coastal president of West of brown enterprise of the James, in 1999 advance of unnecessary characteristic, the singer of legend for the $1,000,000 which appeals him, the Agbalaya of 3 it is appealed, 36 years before being old, the model and mother Lisa Ross.
In May which is required the suit which 2000 year file is done than " ' to be more characteristic machine ' title simply is to one of many collision records of Brown of the James; In addition as for that the person it probably is description of Brown of the James. "
I have no idea why I did all this, out-and-out boredom, mostly - but I like the way the article reads this way, really...you can almost figure out what the heck it's about but not quite, it sounds like some kind of bizarre mental-patient prose.
I don't think Brown of the James would object to being called "The Teaching Father of Mind", it sounds like a really cool Japanese title for a learned Zen Master, although it doesn't have the snappiness of "Godfather of Soul".
Incidentally, I realize that making the Japanese to English conversion and then reversing the process may have made for more errors than normally would occur and sabotaged the translation slightly, but as far as I can tell, that's the same kind of accuracy you get from Babelfish in general.
Here's a translation of an article about the current "Courtney Love versus The Goo-Goo Dolls" legal wranglings I found on a popular german music site. There are no line breaks in this one because I don't speak german, it's as is, translated directly from german to english:
How from sets the New York post office oozed, at present the private recordings of Nirvana singer Kurt Cobain in New Yorks publisher sets make the round. " Kurts family tried to publish on basis of its writings a book ", was called it by a source designated not more near. There would be Songtexte, drawings, papers over its career plans for Nirvana, revised lists of its favourite disks and out-curving sections over drug consumption and the media. Such a book could possibly support the argumentation of the Cobain widow Courtney Love. In her law case with the ex-Nirvana-musicians Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters) and Krist Novoselic tries to state the getting front woman that Cobai was the actual creative strength behind Nirvana and you should be entitled as a widow the order over the musical deduction alone.
Huh???? I didn't get all of that, did you? From what I gather, though, Courtney's winning and good for her, I like the Goo-Goo's and all but I think she's caught a bad rap as the evil dragonlady behind Kurt's death. She's actually a surprisingly smart, literate person and has a lot of interesting opinions, as you can see by visiting her band Hole's website - which, by the way, is easily one of the coolest band sites I've ever come across. Courtney was pro-Napster - unlike a lot of people whom I won't mention by name (Napster Bad!) and has dozens of mp3s - including some of Hole's biggest hits - available on the site for free.
Oh well, enough with my Babelfish musings and ramblings about Hole...I was just in a writing mood today, I guess.
I will now return you to our regularly scheduled programming of funny pictures and links. Thank you for your indulgence.
So I'm bored and looking for things to do and I go to Altavista's Babelfish translator, which is supposed to translate web pages and text for you, from German to English or Spanish to Russian or what have you. It's been around awhile and I always thought it was a neat little web application, in theory - sort of like the "universal translators" they used on Star Trek to converse with people of other races.
Only thing is, it doesn't really work that well...you can get some pretty odd interpetations of the language sometimes...for instance, here's a section of a recent news article about James Brown, in it's original English:
James Brown Off the Hook
A Los Angeles Superior Court jury has cleared James Brown of sexual harassment charges against a former female employee, but ruled the soul belter's company must still face the music for wrongfully terminating her.
Lisa Ross Agbalaya, a 36-year-old former model and mother of three who served as the West Coast president of James Brown Enterprises, sued the legendary singer for $1 million, accusing him of harassing her and making unwanted sexual advances when she visited his home in Augusta, Georgia, in 1999.
The suit, filed in May 2000, claimed, " 'Sex Machine' is more than simply a title to one of James Brown's many hit records; it would also appear to be a description of James Brown the man."
(Article from Entertainment - E! Online Music)
Okay...now here's the article after I translated it (using Babelfish) into Japanese, then back to English. (note: I've left a blank underline in the spot where translation of the Japanese characters seemed not to have worked at all, in lieu of pasting them (so no one would have to hassle with a "this page requires Japanese language support" download message from their browser) and inserted caps where needed) :
The James Becomes Brown from the Hook Separated
The Teaching Father of Mind feels approximately now whose substance is good.
The jury of the Los Angeles excellent courthouse removed the Brown of the James of ____ fullness vis-a-vis the employee of the female before, the company of the belter of mind being controlled, music in order to finish her illegally must calm down the surface.
She was useful the Augusta, when Georgia visited that house someone bother her as coastal president of West of brown enterprise of the James, in 1999 advance of unnecessary characteristic, the singer of legend for the $1,000,000 which appeals him, the Agbalaya of 3 it is appealed, 36 years before being old, the model and mother Lisa Ross.
In May which is required the suit which 2000 year file is done than " ' to be more characteristic machine ' title simply is to one of many collision records of Brown of the James; In addition as for that the person it probably is description of Brown of the James. "
I have no idea why I did all this, out-and-out boredom, mostly - but I like the way the article reads this way, really...you can almost figure out what the heck it's about but not quite, it sounds like some kind of bizarre mental-patient prose.
I don't think Brown of the James would object to being called "The Teaching Father of Mind", it sounds like a really cool Japanese title for a learned Zen Master, although it doesn't have the snappiness of "Godfather of Soul".
Incidentally, I realize that making the Japanese to English conversion and then reversing the process may have made for more errors than normally would occur and sabotaged the translation slightly, but as far as I can tell, that's the same kind of accuracy you get from Babelfish in general.
Here's a translation of an article about the current "Courtney Love versus The Goo-Goo Dolls" legal wranglings I found on a popular german music site. There are no line breaks in this one because I don't speak german, it's as is, translated directly from german to english:
How from sets the New York post office oozed, at present the private recordings of Nirvana singer Kurt Cobain in New Yorks publisher sets make the round. " Kurts family tried to publish on basis of its writings a book ", was called it by a source designated not more near. There would be Songtexte, drawings, papers over its career plans for Nirvana, revised lists of its favourite disks and out-curving sections over drug consumption and the media. Such a book could possibly support the argumentation of the Cobain widow Courtney Love. In her law case with the ex-Nirvana-musicians Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters) and Krist Novoselic tries to state the getting front woman that Cobai was the actual creative strength behind Nirvana and you should be entitled as a widow the order over the musical deduction alone.
Huh???? I didn't get all of that, did you? From what I gather, though, Courtney's winning and good for her, I like the Goo-Goo's and all but I think she's caught a bad rap as the evil dragonlady behind Kurt's death. She's actually a surprisingly smart, literate person and has a lot of interesting opinions, as you can see by visiting her band Hole's website - which, by the way, is easily one of the coolest band sites I've ever come across. Courtney was pro-Napster - unlike a lot of people whom I won't mention by name (Napster Bad!) and has dozens of mp3s - including some of Hole's biggest hits - available on the site for free.
Oh well, enough with my Babelfish musings and ramblings about Hole...I was just in a writing mood today, I guess.
I will now return you to our regularly scheduled programming of funny pictures and links. Thank you for your indulgence.
Tuesday, February 19, 2002
Mail-order brides from hell (Warning: there are much worse things on the net than this, but some folks might find something offensive here and I haven't thoroughly checked this site out, so enter at your own risk, it's funny stuff, though)
DAS KUKKENHOES!!!!!!!!!111111
Here's an interesting Ebay item for you. Sorry folks, bidding is closed on this one but I think the pic pretty much says it all. Who wouldn't love a hand-knitted doghair sweater for Christmas or their birthday? It went for five dollars, in case you were wondering.
In another auction-related item, Dean Kamen is auctioning three Segway scooters *ahem* sorry, Dean - I meant to say "human transporters", not scooters - on Amazon.com. They're not planned for public release for another year. Look...I like Kamen and all and I think the Segway is pretty cool tech. However, after seeing Kamen (this time joined by Jeff Bezos, Amazon's founder and CEO) on Good Morning America for a second time, putting around and leaning back and forth and twirling around in circles on the things at three miles an hour, there's no denying the fact that it's absolutely impossible not to look like a tool while riding one. Next time just make us the damn jet pack, Dean - okay? Because if you're right and this thing really is the future of inner-city transportation, our inner-city commuters are going to look like vast legions of nerds.
In another auction-related item, Dean Kamen is auctioning three Segway scooters *ahem* sorry, Dean - I meant to say "human transporters", not scooters - on Amazon.com. They're not planned for public release for another year. Look...I like Kamen and all and I think the Segway is pretty cool tech. However, after seeing Kamen (this time joined by Jeff Bezos, Amazon's founder and CEO) on Good Morning America for a second time, putting around and leaning back and forth and twirling around in circles on the things at three miles an hour, there's no denying the fact that it's absolutely impossible not to look like a tool while riding one. Next time just make us the damn jet pack, Dean - okay? Because if you're right and this thing really is the future of inner-city transportation, our inner-city commuters are going to look like vast legions of nerds.
An article about blogging on Wired, by Farhad Manjoo. Here's an excerpt:
"It depends on what you get into it for," said Matt Haughey, who created MetaFilter, a discussion site frequented by bloggers. "If you get into it thinking you are going to be popular, it'll fall out of fashion for you."
Crap. There goes another dream, shot to hell. :(
Blah, Blah, Blah and Blog
"It depends on what you get into it for," said Matt Haughey, who created MetaFilter, a discussion site frequented by bloggers. "If you get into it thinking you are going to be popular, it'll fall out of fashion for you."
Crap. There goes another dream, shot to hell. :(
Blah, Blah, Blah and Blog
These little guys, known as Xoloitzcuintles (pronounced "show-low-eats-queen-tlees") are the hot new dog in the United States, fetching as much as two thousand dollars a pup. They were once considered a delicacy by the Aztecs and the hairless dogs have such sensitive skin they require sunblock before being walked. I think I'll pass, just give me a beagle or something.
Independent News
Monday, February 18, 2002
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)