Friday, April 19, 2002

Where Can I Go, Where The Cold Winds Don't Blow Now?

Of course it would have been easy to go with the obvious headline, "Don't Do the Crime If You Can't Do the Time", but I thought I'd go the extra mile and lift another line from the ultra-cool Baretta theme song, which you can listen to here(note: apparently the cheapskate S.O.B. who runs that site, which none of the links worked to unless you sent him some money via paypal, but did, at least, play the show's theme, looked at his logs and came back here and decided his precious, crappy Baretta theme-music wasn't something he could give away for free and took it down. In hopes that he stops back by, since I just went there: I'd just like to say you're a jackass and good luck getting anyone to pay you for your crappyass tv show fan site, pal, you jerk). Amazingly, given the huge amount of fanatical fan sites for tv shows, it was the only real Baretta site I could find (and it's owner sucks). I'm sure that will change in the weeks ahead as people begin obsessing over each episode of the seventies cop drama, picking them apart for clues as to the underlying mania that (allegedly) turned the former Little Rascal's star into a murderer.

Blake has finally been arrested in connection with his wife's murder, his driver as well, as I'm sure most of the free world has heard by the time you read this. I'd like to dedicate this particular article to my friend Bill. Bill and I are both pretty big fans of celebrity crime stories and we were beginning to think we were the only ones on earth who were scratching their heads wondering what ever happened to this story, as it seemed to have been swept under the rug completely after awhile.

Bill, buddy, you hung in there, you kept the faith and now it's paid off and you can tell the world "I told you so!" with righteous indignance and, if you'd like, I'd be more than happy to let you have your say on the matter here in this humble forum whenever you wish. This being such a juicy story and one that we've held dear to our hearts for so long, I hardly know where to begin, myself.

How's this for starters? A little trivia nugget for you: In the very first episode of Baretta, Baretta and his fiance` were entering a resturaunt when she was gunned down by vengeful mobsters. A little foreshadowing? Blake's attorney apparently saw that episode, that's how he says it probably went down. Marcia Clark, O.J. trial star, begs to differ, however, saying, “I really believe if Robert Blake were just John Q. Smith he would be in custody right now.” way back in May, 2001. I'd have to agree with her on that one.

Your average vengeful dude doesn't carry a collector's quality Walther pistol. Guess who's an avid gun collector, though? Also, supposedly, the same brand of ammo, which IS a popular Remington brand, in all fairness, was found in Blake's house. In fact, a whole box...minus three bullets. How many bullets were fired to kill Bakley? Two...with one more left in the chamber of the gun (which was found in a nearby trash bin).

You know, I missed the CNN coverage, I'm sure I can see it online, but from what I hear it was a bit of a letdown in comparison to the theatrics of the O.J. arrest. The least Baretta could have done was hop in his car and take the cops on a road chase or something. Still, though...this has all the makings of classic Court TV and in addition, if Blake does get nailed for the murder, which is very possible, he could very well be the first Hollywood celeb to face the death penalty for murder.

Of course, the question on everyone's mind is, what's O.J. have to say about all this? Here's his take on things, from the tv tabloid Extra:

"I've got to admit, I was pretty fascinated when I first heard it," Simpson told the syndicated show Extra . "And my first reaction was an immediate feeling of compassion for him because I knew what he was about to go through."

The former football star also said he had advised Blake not to take a lie detector test or watch TV, and advised him against besmirching his late wife's character.

"Don't take a lie-detector test", spoken like a true wife-murderer who's been there, done that. Maybe you might want to stay out of it, Juice, I don't think Blake really needs you as his media cheerleader right now, somehow I don't think it'll help.

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